How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
