I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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