Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
