This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize