Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Randomize
