hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize