would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
