Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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