i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
