Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
