This girl is more easily done than said...
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
