you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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