so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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