why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
