have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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