We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I think a kid would responsible me up
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
