There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
