Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize