You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
