I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
