You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
