I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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