its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
