That's when you crack a 10am beer
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
