last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
