she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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