If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
