Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
