You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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