he wants to bone in the snuggie
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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