And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
