If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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