btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize