soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
