i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
