I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
