I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
