What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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