A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize