I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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