Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
