you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
