I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize