I love black thongs
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
