i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
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