Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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