dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
