How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
