The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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