I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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